What I Am Thankful For In Sports

There are clearly a lot of things to be thankful for on Thanksgiving Day: your family, your friends, the men and women who fight to protect this country, twitter, and obviously sports. While most Americans associate Thanksgiving with turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes, my Thanksgiving is dominated by football, even if the Lions and Cowboys, who have both hosted Thanksgiving Day games every year since 1978, have only won a combined 3 division titles in the last 15 years. With a feast of games on Turkey day (pun intended) including three big NFL matchups (Texans-Lions, Redskins-Cowboys, Patriots-Jets) and a newly installed college football in-state rivalry (TCU-#16 Texas), the Thanksgiving Day action should fill the bellies of hungry football fans (last pun, I promise). Here is what I am thankful for in sports on this 391st Thanksgiving Day.

Despite the fact that the LA Kings championship run as an eight seed was incredible to watch last year, I am thankful for the NHL lockout because now America doesn't have to pretend that we actually care about hockey. For the National Hockey League to be locked out for the 3rd time since 1994 and the 2nd time in the last 8 years is an absolute disgrace. I would advise Gary Bettman, who has dealt with more labor stoppages since he became NHL Commissioner in 1993 than ever imaginable, to not travel to Canada anytime in the near future.

I am thankful that Chelsea fired Roberto Di Matteo because at this rate, I have a chance to become the Blues manager. The European Champions, who fired Di Matteo a little more than six months after he completed the FA Cup and Champions League double, have had more managers since Roman Abramovich bought the club in 2003 than Egypt have had Presidents. The London club have now had 9 different managers in a six year span since September of 2007 (Jose Mourinho, Avram Grant, Luiz Felipe Scolari, Ray Wilkins, Guus Hiddink, Carlo Ancelotti, Andre-Villas Boas, Roberto Di Matteo, and Rafa Benitez). In fact, neither one of their last two managers, Andre-Villas Boas or Roberto Di Matteo, lasted 10 months with the job. Good luck to Rafa Benitez because looking at Chelsea's past managerial history, come a year from now, he will likely be watching the Chelsea games from his couch like the rest of us.

I am thankful for Cleveland sports teams because whenever I am feeling down in the dumps about the Red Sox, I remember that it could be worse: I could be a Cleveland sports fan. The Browns have made the playoffs just twice in the last 23 years, while the Indians and Cavaliers have lost superstars left and right including CC Sabathia, Cliff Lee, Victor Martinez, and some guy named LeBron James. Cleveland sports teams are like a sequel to a bad movie; you think that they might improve, but they just wind up terrible once again.

I am thankful that J.J. Watt is a pro football player because he is much too talented and way too hard of a worker to be delivering pizzas in Pewaukee, Wisconsin. Watt, who I kid you not, worked for pizza hut after he dropped out of school because he no longer wanted to play tight end for Central Michigan, is now one of the most dominant defensive ends in the NFL, and he is the front-runner to win the Defensive Player Of The Year Award at the mid-season mark. The former Wisconsin standout (he transferred to the Big Ten school in 2008 and played 2 years there) deflects more balls at the line of scrimmage than anybody else in the NFL and his 13.5 sacks are 2nd most in the league, only behind San Francisco's Aldon Smith (15).

I am thankful that Novak Djokvoic is the world's number 1 ranked tennis player. While I enjoy watching the Serbian's mastery on the court, it is a nice bonus that his girlfriend, Jelena Ristic, is a spectacle to see on her own. Since Ristic is shown on TV more than Rob Ryan during the Cowboys games, it is undeniable that Djokovic brings the total package to his matches. But in all seriousness, Djokvoic deserves a lot of credit for reclaiming the number 1 ranking from Roger Federer and winning the year end ATP World Tour Finals.

As hard as this is for me to say, I am actually thankful that #1 Notre Dame is undefeated because outside of Gainesville nobody wants to see #4 Florida in the BCS National Championship Game. The Gators, whose offense has looked so anemic this year that you wonder how they have only lost one game, would likely wind up in the National Championship if they were to beat #10 Florida St. and Notre Dame were to lose to USC. This Florida team, which at home needed two touchdowns in the last two minutes to beat Louisiana-Lafayette, would not be able to score against any of the top college football teams.

I am thankful that Andrew Bynum's hair is one of the main talking points of the early NBA season; now if only the big 7 footer could get onto the floor for the 76ers. Although Bynum should have a nice role in Doug Collins's offense, the injury prone center is still suffering from right and left knee setbacks, which could keep him out until January. Hopefully, Bynum can return to action for Philadelphia shortly, because then people can start talking about Bynum and basketball, along with his hair of course.

Andrew Bynum then

Andrew Bynum now

But enough about me already. What are other people in sports thankful for?

Toronto Blue Jays fans are thankful for their new best friend, Miami Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria. After Loria decided that he was fed up with the Marlins large payroll, his fire sale saw the team's two best pitchers (Josh Johnson and Mark Buehrle) and star shortstop (Jose Reyes) head north of the border to Toronto. Now that the Marlins shed nearly 150 million dollars in the mega-trade and their opening day payroll is currently projected at less than 40 million (in comparison the Padres and A's are arond 55 million) it is evident that Loria cares less about his team than a male audience cares about the new Twilight movie.

Washington Redskin fans are thankful that they now have a real quarterback with Robert Griffin III. Nothing against Jason Campbell, Tood Collins, Rex Grossman, and John Beck, but the Skins haven't had a real quality quarterback since the Stone Age. Ok, more like Joe Theismann in the 1980's but it feels like forever. Not only is RGIII the most dynamic quarterback to ever play in the NFL, but his Heisman Trophy socks were beyond awesome. In any case, Washington should be thankful for their rookie sensation.

Although the Luck vs RGIII debate will rage on for years, we can all agree that Griffin trumps Luck in the sock department.

Finally, Tim Tebow is thankful for God, but who didn't know that one already.